why didn't you poke me back
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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