guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
