Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
