wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
How does one acquire holy water?
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize