Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
