I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
