Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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