If that was your dad, he is hot
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize