I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
