Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
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