There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
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