Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
