Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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