Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
