Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
