She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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