3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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