drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
