therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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