on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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