Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
