Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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