you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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