i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Randomize
