we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
