Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
