Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
