so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
