My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
