Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.