well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
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I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit