I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
we're making bets on your personal life
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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