Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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