Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Randomize