Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
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I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
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They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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