I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize