sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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