My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
