One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
