I accidentally had phone sex last night
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize