quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
it's like heaven, but drunker
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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