the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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