Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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