Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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