we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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