at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Randomize