just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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