Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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