I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
