ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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