If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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