Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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